


Find Your Way in the Dark

by Cinnamongirl



Series: Find Your Way in the Dark [1]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Class Issues, F/M, Gender Issues, Jealousy, Love Triangles, Massage, body image issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-03
Updated: 2014-04-03
Packaged: 2018-01-18 00:23:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1408111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cinnamongirl/pseuds/Cinnamongirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aeducan breaks up with Alistair and gets together with Zevran.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The surface is fucking weird.

**Author's Note:**

> Somewhat edited from the original version posted on the kmeme.
> 
> Apologies to Alistair. I swear it's nothing personal.

Sereda Aeducan stared at the fortress of Ostagar and tried to stay calm. She had told the human that she would be able to follow his instructions, but she was confused and terrified. The surface was so _big_ and everything seemed wrong up here. The sun hurt her eyes. There were lots of weird and unpleasant smells. She eventually found a human soldier who pointed her in the direction of the other Warden she was supposed to be meeting. At least most of the humans she had met were polite to her. 

The human Warden kept saying things about magic that didn't make sense to Sereda, but he was generally friendly. She realized that he expected her to lead him, even though he knew the area better. So much for not getting lost anymore. Sereda discovered a species of large, hairy animals and managed to put a muzzle on one. She also got to meet elves for the first time. Sereda wasn't sure what she had expected, but they didn't seem much different from humans. She met two other human Warden recruits, who started following her as well. She was starting to get used to being shorter than everyone, but she hadn't decided if it was better to constantly strain her neck or to look at people's chests when she was talking to them. They were given an assignment. _So I haven't officially joined yet and I'm already leading a unit?_ she thought. _The one with the earring-Duncan?-must want to see what I can do. I won't let him down._

Once they started fighting darkspawn, Sereda realized that she felt more comfortable. This was something that she was used to, and something she could do well. She was fighting them in mud and grass instead of in the Deep Roads, but the technique was the same. The senior Warden- _I think he said his name was Alistair, I need to try to remember these_ -fought well. She noticed that he used a shield and longsword like she did. They met two human women. The younger one had a very strange outfit. Sereda decided that her left arm and her body from the waist down must be cold, while the rest of her body got hot easily.

After that, everything got even more confusing. Two of the humans died. Sereda drank something disgusting and passed out. She, Alistair, and two other humans killed a lot more darkspawn. Sereda passed out again. She woke up in bed in her underwear and noticed that the younger woman from earlier was staring at her. She thought frantically, _Did I just sleep with a human? A female human?!_ Actually, it turned out that some humans had betrayed some other humans and the older woman rescued them from certain death. Apparently, people betrayed each other pretty frequently on the surface, too. Alistair was very upset about it.

The human with the inconsistent body temperature- _Morrigan, I need to remember this one too_ -followed Sereda and Alistair to another human city. On the way, they met the hairy animal, who also apparently wanted to join the group. They discussed their plans and Sereda found out that she would have to go back to Orzammar. She tried not to think about it.

While they were in the city, the team acquired two more members: another human and a qunari (who were essentially larger humans, as far as Sereda could tell). She wondered if agreeing to follow strangers indefinitely was standard surfacer behavior. Alistair mentioned wanting to go to Redcliffe, because there was someone there who he wanted to talk to. This gave Sereda a good excuse to put off Orzammar, so they left Lothering heading toward Redcliffe. When they camped along the way, she found out that two surface dwarves had joined them. Unlike the other people who followed her, they wouldn't help her fight but they were willing to pay for the random junk she had looted from dead bodies. It was nice to have people who she could talk to without neck strain. She also spent time talking to the people who were following her. Sten and Morrigan seemed to be constantly irritated with her, but Leliana and Alistair were nicer. She talked with Alistair about being a Grey Warden, and about his life before he joined the Wardens. Leliana sang, told stories, and put little braids in Sereda's hair. Even in spite of their very different backgrounds and all the chaos that was happening around them, Sereda realized that she and Leliana were quickly becoming friends. 

When they were outside of Redcliffe, Alistair told Sereda that he was the bastard son of the human king. Not the one who had just died, but a different human king who was also dead. Sereda realized that if Alistair's family had been dwarves, he and his mother would have been raised up to the Noble caste and his life would have been similar to hers. “I actually used to be a princess, but I was exiled. Did I ever tell you that?” she said.

“Wow, really?" Alistair seemed happy to talk about something other than himself. "That's terrible; I'm so sorry.”

“Thank you. Hey, it's like we're the royal rejects!” Sereda tried to lighten the mood.

“Haha, yeah!" Alistair laughed. "It's good to talk to someone who understands.”

Redcliffe was a clusterfuck, which seemed to be typical for the surface. Sereda met a few more surface dwarves, but they turned out to be cowards. They had somewhere to live and they refused to defend it until she threatened them. Sereda and her team killed a lot of things that were already dead. They seemed to stay dead the second time, at least. Sereda had been worried that she wouldn't be successful as a Warden, but it mostly seemed to consist of walking long distances and killing things with her sword. She was good at those. Unfortunately, the noble human who Alistair wanted to meet was sick, and there was a young human who also had some kind of magical sickness that made his voice different. They had to go to a city called Denerim to find out about the the cure for the older one and the Circle of Magi to get the mages to help cure the younger one. Alistair pointed out that they had to convince the mages to help with the Blight anyway, but Sereda realized that the Circle was on the way to Orzammar, while Denerim was the opposite direction. She insisted on going to Denerim and the group followed.

A few days later, while they were in camp, Alistair gave Sereda something. It looked like some of the flowers she had seen growing, except that the colors were less bright and it had a stiff texture. “I picked it in Lothering and it's dried out by now.” He went on to say something about why he gave it to her but she had trouble focusing enough to listen. The flower was brittle, and it looked like it would be easy to crush. How had he kept it intact all this time? Alistair seemed to be implying that he was interested in her romantically. Why? There were human women everywhere; why would he want her? Sereda hadn't really thought about Alistair like that before, but she had to admit that he was kind, and he was a strong fighter. She suddenly remembered Gorim's parting words to her and she felt guilty. Alistair was staring at her and waiting for a response, so she thanked him.


	2. Alistair is okay.

The group finally made it to Denerim. As they walked through the city, Sereda thought she heard a familiar voice. It couldn't be, right? She was just imagining things because of what she had been thinking earlier. Maybe she was disoriented from walking so long? When they got closer, she saw that it WAS Gorim. He was wearing fancy clothes instead of armor, but it was definitely him.

“M-my lady? My lady Aeducan?” It turned out that Gorim was a merchant now, and he was married. His wife was the daughter of the smith whose armor and weapons Gorim was selling. She was pregnant. Gorim looked very uncomfortable. It had been maybe a few months since he told Sereda that he would always love her. 

Sereda read between the lines of what he was saying. Gorim had arrived on the surface during a Blight without any money or connections. He had obviously found a family of surface dwarves and charmed his way into their lives. Gorim was giving his father-in-law a grandchild in exchange for a job, and probably a house. “So, when do I get to meet your lucky wife?,” Sereda asked, trying to sound calm.

Gorim visibly relaxed and agreed to introduce them. She found herself hoping that his wife was beautiful, and that she treated him well. She knew Gorim would be good to her. He gave her the Shield of Aeducan that had started this whole mess, and a letter from her father.

Sereda vaguely remembered the reason why they had come to Denerim in the first place. She was in a daze when she went into the house of the scholar who they were supposed to meet. While the group was exploring the house like they always did, the scholar- _no, wait, he said he was someone else so why does he even care?_ -told them not to go into the back room. _But we do this everywhere we go!_ Sereda thought. _Leliana picks locks and we steal stuff right in front of people and nobody says anything! Why doesn't this person know that yet?_ The person somehow overlooked the fact that Sereda was wearing heavy armor and carrying a sword and attacked her. He wasn't very difficult to kill. There was a corpse in the back room, along with information that the scholar they were looking for was actually in a city called Haven. According to her map, Haven was in the Western part of Ferelden, like the entrance to Orzammar. Fuck.

Later that night while she was sitting in camp, Sereda remembered the letter from her father and read it. She felt even more angry and confused. Her father didn't think she was guilty, but he exiled her to avoid scandal that would “cost our family [meaning Bhelen] the throne.” Was that supposed to make her feel better? She thought about Gorim, again. He now had a family and a stable place to live, things that she would never have. 

Sereda walked up to Alistair and asked if he wanted to have sex with her. To her surprise, he agreed.

It wasn't horrible. It was mainly just awkward. Sereda wasn't used to the height difference and it took some maneuvering for them to figure out that the most comfortable position for both of them was Alistair on his back with her on top. He came very quickly. She reasoned that this was understandable, considering his inexperience. She tried to show him how to use his hands on her, but they were large and clumsy. Alistair seemed to really enjoy himself, at least. To his credit, he repeatedly expressed the desire to please her and he seemed eager to take direction.

She slept with him a few more times on the way to Lake Calenhad. It got a little more enjoyable. Somewhat. Not that it was terrible or that there was anything wrong with him.

Sereda didn't know much about magic and the whole idea made her nervous. She brought Alistair with her to the Circle of Magi because he apparently had some kind of anti-magic magical abilities (he had tried to explain it to her before but it didn't make any sense). Sereda also brought Morrigan because she wanted to have at least one mage on her side, and Leliana for disarming traps and picking locks. The whole experience was very strange. At one point, she got magically transported to some kind of magic world but she managed to make it back safely. She was relieved to find out that swords could kill demons just like they kill anything else, except for one really big demon where she had to read a magic book to stop it(?!). Sereda was still confused when she exited the tower, but at least the mages had agreed to help Connor Guerrin and fight alongside her. 

As Sereda's group traveled away from the Circle Tower, they were ambushed by a group of people. Her party had managed to kill everyone else when Sereda got to the leader. She was about to stab him when he dropped his weapons and offered to surrender. This was a change from everyone else who had been attacking them so far. His appearance was striking. She noticed that he had long ears, which meant that he was an elf (the humans she'd met claimed that there were other differences between them and elves but that was the only difference she could see). He had a tattoo on his face like one of the casteless. The assassin had long hair and no beard, like a woman, but he didn't seem to have breasts or hips. When Sereda agreed to hear him out, he immediately started flirting with her. She blushed and decided to spare his life.

Sereda also bought a control rod for a golem. She hadn't had a lot of experience with golems, but she knew how useful they were. It turned out that she had to fight yet another demon. The golem they had gone to so much trouble to obtain was not only sentient and willful, but _grumpy_. Sereda apparently couldn't get enough of tall beings following her around, so she let the golem join the group.


	3. Zevran is different, but sexy.

The assassin was a very odd person. She couldn't stop thinking about his body, but she was sure that this was just because it confused her. Zevran didn't look at all like men were supposed to look. He even wore skirts, which allowed her to see his slim, hairless legs. Zevran wasn't like anyone she had ever seen before and she couldn't stop staring at him. She was pretty sure that he noticed her staring, too. She hoped that Alistair didn't. Talking with Zevran didn't help the situation. He had a lot of strange stories about Antiva, which was apparently a country on the surface where he was from. It sounded like Antivan politics were just as ruthless as those in Orzammar, but much more chaotic. Zevran's whole background was alarming. He didn't know who his father even was, and his mother was a prostitute who died when he was born. He grew up in a brothel before he became some kind of indentured servant to an assassin's guild. She knew that she probably shouldn't judge him, but a voice in the back of her head kept pointing out that he was practically a duster (or whatever the surface equivalent was) and he made no attempts to hide it. Why wasn't he more ashamed?

Zevran continued to flirt with her, but she learned that he also flirted with almost everyone else. It was flattering the first time he called her beautiful, but it was harder to take him seriously when he said the same thing to Morrigan and Leliana. They were both clearly more beautiful than she was. Sereda suddenly felt very short and fat. She had grown up hearing of her beauty frequently, and while she had always known that this was partially because she was the king's daughter, it hurt to realize how unappealing she really was. She was pretty sure that she was at least more attractive than Wynne-magical bosom notwithstanding-but Zevran seemed to be trying to sleep with her, too. Was he actually interested in everyone, or just really desperate? At least Alistair only seemed interested in Sereda. That didn't stop Zevran from flirting with him, too. Alistair's embarrassed reactions were entertaining, if nothing else. 

Sereda continued to sleep with Alistair occasionally but her heart wasn't really in it. She wondered what sex with Zevran would be like. He had all these exciting stories about interesting people who he had bedded and then killed, but the recurring theme was that he was an amazing and talented lover. She knew that he was just trying to seduce her, but at least some of it had to be true. Right?

They made their way toward the city of Haven. Alistair was arguing with Morrigan again about something stupid. Sereda wanted to try to talk with Zevran again, but she wasn't sure what to say. He was interested in her, right? He had to be, or he wouldn't keep staring luridly at her. Even though her legs were probably twice as wide as his (and she knew this because he showed off more of his legs than most women did). Sereda was trying to think of a question she hadn't asked him yet when she heard Zevran attempting to flirt with Shale. She sighed.


	4. Difficult conversations are difficult.

“He is good-looking, yes?” Fuck. Leliana had caught her staring at Zevran again while they were in camp. Fortunately, he was heading into the woods to look for poison ingredients so she was pretty sure he hadn't heard.

“Yeah, I guess? I'm not sure...”

“And your Alistair, he is also quite handsome.”

“Yes, he is. Yes. He's very nice to me, too.” How had she ended up having this conversation anyway? Leliana was apparently too perceptive for her own good.

“Are you feeling all right? You look upset.”

“I just don't know what to do, okay? I know I should be happy that I have two men who are interested in me but I'm not sure what I should do. Alistair is supposedly in love with me and he's fine, I guess. I mean there's nothing wrong with him. He's kind of annoying sometimes and his jokes aren't as funny as he thinks they are but I'm probably being too critical. And I can't stop thinking about Zev and he's really interesting and sexy but it's not like he would ever settle down with anyone and if he did, it wouldn't be me, you know? And would I even want that? I used to be a noble and now I'm not even good enough for the son of a whore? I know my whole life is different now and I'm literally lower than everybody but I'm not sure if I'm ready to be that person. But then there's Alistair and he used to be nobility too and it's not like he's trying to bed everyone else so I should be happy with him, right? I always thought my family would marry me off to some noble family to form a strategic alliance or something but now that I get to make my own choice it isn't much better. I don't know...” Sereda paused to breathe. Leliana was probably just trying to be polite and she had exploded feelings everywhere. She groaned and rested her face in her hands.

“I don't know who you should choose between Alistair and Zevran, but you are fortunate that those are not the only options. I do know that you shouldn't stay with someone if you have to convince yourself that you love him, because that isn't fair to either of you. And a lot of people wonder who they are-this is something I wonder about myself quite often-but 'who am I?' and 'which man should I be with?' are not the same question.” That... was actually a good point. Sereda realized that she had created a false dichotomy. It wasn't like she had to choose between either Alistair or Zevran. There were a lot of other men out there. Or alternately (and more likely) she would end up with no one. Still, it wasn't right to let her feelings about Zevran influence her feelings about her relationship with Alistair. And, honestly, she had been trying to talk herself into loving Alistair and it hadn't been working. She was pretty sure that he did actually love her, though. This would be uncomfortable. 

“Shit, I think I have to break up with him," Sereda said to Leliana with a sigh. "Thanks for listening at least.”

Sereda steeled herself and walked to the other side of the camp, where Alistair was. This was more nerve-wracking than fighting demons. “Alistair?”

“Yeeees?”

“I think we need to end this now.” She stared at his chest, grateful for once that it was easy to avoid meeting his eyes.

“Oh, I see. Can I ask why?”

“I-I'd rather not talk about it.”

“I guess it's better this way. Let's not drag it out. I'll leave you alone, then, since that's apparently what you want.” That could have gone worse. She went back to her tent to lie down but she couldn't sleep.

The rest of the trip to Haven was uncomfortable. She tried to avoid looking at Alistair as much as possible. When she chose her team to go into the city and left him at camp, he had an unreadable expression on his face.


	5. Massages are fun.

Sereda found herself dealing with human cultists. As far as she could tell, the cultists and the other humans she had met both seemed to worship Andraste, but they disagreed about who she was. Some thought she was a dead human and the others thought she was a dragon. Sereda had once asked Leliana about her religion. Leliana said that Andraste was a human who was revered because she had done something important involving magic and slaves and a war. That made sense, at least. Andraste was essentially a surfacer Paragon. Apparently, however, there was someone else called the Maker who was more important. But if this was true, why did Leliana say that she was Andrastean and why were there so many statues of her? “Humans are _weird_ ,” she said out loud.

Zevran laughed. “I often find myself thinking the same thing.”

Sereda didn't care about either version of Andraste, but she decided not to defile the ashes because Leliana didn't want her to.

They ended up having to kill dragon-Andraste. The group was already sore and exhausted from fighting never-ending waves of cultists, and they barely managed to survive the fight with the dragon. Sereda wasn't sure how she managed to drag her injured body down the hill to the camp. Wynne was able to heal the damage, but Sereda still felt awful. Alistair kept staring at her from a distance, looking worried and uncomfortable. She went inside her tent to get some privacy.

After she had been in the tent for about an hour, Zevran poked his head in. “How are you doing, my dear Warden?” He had removed his armor so that Wynne could heal him too, and he was wearing a shirt and pants.

Sereda tried to sound casual. “I've been worse. Even though I'm hurting in body parts I didn't know I had. That's bad, right?”

His face softened. “You were very brave today. Although... do try to be careful. Even with your heavy armor... The Archdemon would be very sad if you stood him up because a dragon stepped on you.”

“No, we couldn't have that, could we? Hey, is your offer of a massage still good?” When his face perked up, she added “Just a massage, though. I don't think I'm in any shape for anything else.”

“As you wish. I still do recommend removing clothes-purely for your own comfort, of course. I will return shortly.” He left her tent. Sereda stripped down to her underclothes and waited for him. Zevran returned holding a bottle. “Lie down on your stomach and try to make yourself comfortable,” he said.

She spread out on her bedroll. Zevran knelt down beside her. She felt his hands start to rub her back. “You know, I do enjoy women with muscles but yours are in bad shape. You are fortunate that I am here, yes?” She felt something slippery. There must have been oil in the bottle. Strong fingers worked the knots out of her back. _If his hands are that talented, why isn't he better at lockpicking?_ He moved to her shoulders, and then her arms. It felt REALLY good. She noticed Zevran shift back, and then felt him massaging oil into her feet. It had to contain some kind of healing balm. There was no way that he could accomplish this much with just his hands, right? Sereda tried to wear good-quality boots and keep them repaired, but walking and fighting constantly put a lot of strain on her feet. Zevran made them feel... lighter, maybe? She tried not to moan audibly. He worked his way up her legs to her thighs. She felt his hands on her inner thighs, just a few inches away from-

Almost surprisingly, Zevran did not touch her ass or genitals. Even more surprisingly, she was disappointed. When he asked her to roll over, she noticed that his cock was very hard inside his pants. Somehow she hadn't felt it, even though he had been leaning over her. He must have been very careful not to poke her. She wasn't sure what to think about that. Zevran noticed Sereda staring at his groin and raised his eyebrows. 

“Um, I think that's enough. It felt very good, thank you so much!,” she stammered. She tried not to meet his eyes or look at his crotch and ended up staring at his chest, which was interestingly lean, but still broad compared to the rest of his body. She could see his collarbones through the thin shirt, and the outlines of his muscles... Damn it. She turned her head to look at the wall of the tent.

“Are you sure you don't want me to massage your front? I'm only halfway done.” How was he so calm right now?

“No, it's fine, thank you though!” He finally left. Sereda sat up. She marveled at how good her back felt. How long had it been since she hadn't been in pain there? And the massage had been surprisingly chaste, but she was somehow very aroused anyway. Sereda remembered Zevran moving his hands up her legs and wondered what she would have done if he hadn't stopped. She had seen pretty clear evidence that he desired her. She wondered if he was masturbating in his tent right now. Would he be thinking about her? She stared at the tent flaps, where he had just been.


	6. Sex can be an effective distraction.

When everyone had recovered from the fight with dragon-Andraste, the subject of where to go next came up. Alistair, who had barely spoken to her since she ended their relationship, suggested going north to Orzammar to handle the treaty there, so that they wouldn't have to come back this way again. Sereda insisted on going back to Redcliffe, “Well, I just thought that we need to bring back the Ashes and help the magic people do the magic stuff that they were going to do. That's important, right?”

“But we're close to Orzammar now!” Alistair pointed out. “I want to help Eamon, probably more than anyone, but it makes sense to do this while we're in the area. And wasn't that your home, anyway?”

Finally, Leliana said “Why don't you want to go to Orzammar? What is wrong?”

“Remember how I said that my father is the king and I was exiled?” Sereda asked. “They think I killed my older brother, who was first in line for the throne. I was second in line. I'll probably get killed if I show my face there. I know we need to build our army but I'm really scared, okay?”

Everybody was very understanding and sympathetic but they all said that she needed to go back anyway, because the Blight was the priority. Sereda did get multiple promises to watch her back and defend her if anyone tried to kill her.

As the party traveled north, Sereda felt increasingly anxious. She tried talking with Zevran to distract herself. It worked until he told her that he fancied her. _I'm going to have to deal with this head-on, aren't I?_ she thought. 

She forced herself to bring it up while they were in camp. “Look, I'm really attracted to you. That's not a secret. But I can't do this because we want different things.”

“What do you mean?” Zevran looked confused.

She sighed. “I don't... I know you flirt with everyone and you sleep with everyone and that's who you are and I don't want to try to change you or anything but I want... more, I guess. I don't want to be another meaningless sexual encounter for you.”

Zevran looked at the ground. “Warden, I... I don't know if I can give you what you ask for, but I can assure you that you are far from meaningless.” He made eye contact again, clearly waiting for an answer.

“I understand.” Sereda's mind started racing. It was true that she wanted Zevran, and he was kind to her. If he apparently did not and could never love her, she supposed that she could handle that, or end it with him if she couldn't. She just couldn't get rid of the suspicion that Zevran would be having sex with everyone in their group (and everyone they met on the road) if he could. “If we do this, I want to be the only one you're sleeping with. Can I ask for that, at least? I can't stop you from fucking someone else but at least break it off with me, first.” Was she trying to find a way to justify it to herself? On the other hand... even if she was, would that be so bad? 

“That is reasonable.” The flirty smile was back, now.

She took a deep breath. “Okay. So, would you like to join me in my tent?”

As soon as they got into the tent, Zevran bent down and started kissing her neck. He kissed his way up until he reached her mouth. In between kisses, they grinned at each other. Next, he asked Sereda to lie down on her back so could touch the front of her body, now that he finally had a chance. To her surprise, he didn't go straight for her breasts. Instead, he kissed and touched her almost everywhere else until she insisted that he take his clothes off because he had already seen her undressed and it was only fair. 

Sex with Zevran was... fun. That was the only way to describe it. If someone had asked Sereda beforehand, she would have said that of course sex is supposed to be fun and if it isn't then you're doing something wrong, but this was new. Everything with Gorim had been passionate and forbidden. Alistair's heart was in the right place, but her sexual encounters with him had just been awkward. But this... this was very nice. In contrast to the goal-oriented sex she was used to, they just enjoyed each others' bodies for what seemed like hours, until they were both exhausted.


	7. Sereda gained the power of self-respect!

The rest of the trip to Orzammar was more enjoyable after that. Sereda frequently found herself forgetting to be anxious about where they were going. Now that Zevran was calling her something other than Warden, she learned that her name sounded beautiful in his accent (especially when he said it while his hands and feet were tied up and she was riding him).

One day while they were walking, Sereda heard Shale say “I have noticed that the painted elf seeks the attention of the Grey Warden.”

Zevran immediately confirmed this and then said that it was “not such a terrible thought” to consider having children with her. Despite his apprehensions about commitment, Zevran was evidently not ashamed of his relationship with her (not that she knew exactly what their relationship was). Sereda smiled until she saw how sad Alistair looked. He hadn't made eye contact with her since the first time she invited Zevran back to her tent. Her stomach sank. She thought about talking to him, but she realized that it would probably make him feel worse.

The finally reached the Frostback Mountains. The merchants outside complained that Orzammar was closed. What was going on? The guards at the door called Sereda a kinslayer and essentially blamed her for her father's death, but they agreed to let her in when she identified herself as a Grey Warden. She took a deep breath and walked through the door into the Hall of Heroes. Zevran reached down to hold her hand. Even through his gloves and her gauntlets, it felt warm. She looked up to see him smiling encouragingly at her. 

Many people in Orzammar greeted Sereda with either hostility or sympathy, but some of them didn't seem to remember her at all and only called her “Warden.” At least nobody tried to attack her right away. She spoke with Lord Harrowmont's representative and agreed to help him win the support of the assembly. Sereda tried to confront Bhelen, but she found out that she would have to “prove her loyalty” in order to even speak with him. Walking through the Diamond Quarter, she realized that the whole experience was strange, but not for the reasons she had anticipated. Everything in Orzammar was so familiar. Even so, it didn't feel like home anymore. 

Sereda found out that everybody in Orzammar also wanted her to solve lots of their problems. She had thought it was a surface thing, but she was beginning to realize that this must be part of being a Grey Warden. She met a woman from the smith caste who wanted to go live with the mages. She agreed to go back to the Circle to ask them, even though it would delay the journey back to Redcliffe even more. It occurred to her that she never would have thought of encouraging someone to give up their caste and family a year ago. 

She turned to Zevran. “Hey Zev, I've been thinking...”

“You call?”

“Now that I've been on the surface, I'm beginning to realize how messed up it really is down here. I need to kill Bhelen, but I know that he wants to do things like increase trade with the surface and give the casteless more rights. I trust Harrowmont and I know that he's a good man, but I think he'd make everything worse. What do you think I should do?” 

Zevran shrugged. “What about that nug-wrangler fellow? I think he would make a good king.”

“Stop it, I was being serious.” She rolled her eyes.

“So was I. You will have the same army no matter who wins, right? Why worry about what they do after you leave?” She hadn't thought of it that way. It was true that Orzammar was no longer her home, so why did she care?

When Bhelen asked why Sereda was supporting him, she said, “I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive you. You destroyed our family, but Orzammar needs you to bring it into the future. I don't live here now, thanks to you, but I have to do what's right for the country.” She didn't think Bhelen had ever been speechless before, even if it was only for a few seconds.

As Sereda helped Oghren kill his wife, she reflected that her own relationship issues had never really been that bad. They brought back a crown to the Assembly and she presented it to Bhelen. She was announced as “The Grey Warden.” Not Lady Aeducan or kinslayer. _I guess that's who I am now. I'm a Grey Warden. I am a warrior._ She caught Zevran's eye and he grinned. _And, I have a sexy elven lover. I think I will be okay._


End file.
